FEELING FESTIVE (KIND OF)

If you haven't already guessed, I'm not really one for tradition. Something about having to hold myself to a certain preconceived standard that I haven't formed for myself just doesn't sit well with me. So when it comes to the holidays, I have to admit - I'm a bit of a Grinch.

Sure,  I love presents. Who doesn't? However, seeing how completely immersed in materialism some can get with the perfect gift and the perfect decorations and the perfect party - it's a lot of pressure to achieve with everyone trying to achieve the same level of "perfection" all at the same time. Yes, I still watch Christmas movies and listen to Christmas music and get my family and friends gifts and decorate the tree, etc. I'm not against Christmas. I'm against what it can turn into if I let myself get lost in all the "wrapped up with a sparkly bow" details.

The holidays are always a stressful time for everyone - but I think the last several years I've let them become somewhat of a nightmare for me with getting older and the exchanging of gifts. When you're a child, you don't have to worry about things like that. Your parents handle all the stress for you. My mom is one of the best gift-givers I know, and every year I would keep her company as she perused the malls and department stores searching for gifts for the big Christmas parties my extended families would throw every year. Gift wrapping is somewhat of a religion to her - with pristine ribbon curls and neatly folded edges. She decorates the tree (no shorter than 7ft I might add) with a color theme. And me? Well, let's just say that I'm not even fucking close to that, and though I'm not a child anymore, I definitely don't feel like an adult comparing myself to my mom's Christmas magic.

Other than growing older every year, a ton of things have happened in my life that continuously and consistently pull me away from childhood. The holidays are somewhat a reminder of that for me. I don't live with my parents anymore, so maintaining the proper etiquette for a family holiday party raises all sorts of questions for me: I can't mooch off my mom's hard work and write my name on the "From" tag anymore, can I? Do I get just the parents gifts? What do they event want? Do I get just the children gifts? Oh God, what do THEY event want?! Do I cook something to add to the dinner table? WHAT AM I GOING TO WEAR?!!

The last question isn't really a doom and gloom question - but since my outfits are entirely reflective of my mood, I took the opportunity to style something from 2020AVE that has a hint of holiday in it with the color. When I looked at this t-shirt dress, I thought the color was kind of festive - but the comfiness and coziness of it felt so inviting in a manner that had me saying: TO HELL WITH TRADITION.  If you were expecting an outfit post with me in front of the tree, decked out in Rudolph antlers and a shapeless ugly Christmas sweater that itches, I hope you're not too disappointed. That's just not me. The holidays are supposed to be about feeling comfortable and happy. Sure, it's great to get caught up on Christmas spirit with the gifts and the parties and the events. But don't forget that there are much more important things to enjoy.

xx Audrie

Hat: Urban Outfitters // Neckace: Luna B // Dress: 2020AVE // Shoes: Simmi Shoes